Former swimsuit model Elin Nordegren has reportedly avoided the limelight, despite the fact that she is married to the Athlete of the Decade, Tiger Woods. But with recent discoveries of Tiger’s multiple affairs, Elin couldn’t be grabbing more media attention.

It is saddening when we hear of shattered marriages and shattered homes, but for some the celebrity gossip brings to mind other questions for us. Elin Nordegren is, by our cultural standards, a beautiful woman. Some would ask Tiger why he would seek sexual satisfaction elsewhere having married a woman like her?

The very question shows our culture’s premium placed on physical beauty, or at least certain physical standards. I receive hundreds of emails and comments from men who confess their habitual use of pornography, how countless hours of staring at pixilated sex has molded their conception of beauty.

We’ve also heard from hundreds of women who wonder why they are not enough for their porn-viewing husbands. We hear, “I’ll never measure up to porn standards.” This drives some women to reach for physical standards only attainable by anorexia, breast-enhancement, and photographic airbrushing. For others this only leads to despair and giving up on the hope of intimacy with their husbands.

But Elin’s sad story should be instructive to frustrated wives everywhere. Becoming a Swedish bikini model is not the solution to your husband’s porn problem.

Of course, it is commendable to take care of our bodies. It only makes sense that we want to be attractive to our spouses. It only makes sense that we should seek sexual satisfaction in marriage. But becoming your husband’s unrealistic dream girl does not cure a deeply-rooted fixation on pornography.